It was last sunday that we, me and paulo - my husband, re-painted our current house. From a dark green motif to lightning green (light green close to white but still green more like apple green). We woke up as early as 6am. After I brought Kenzi to my mother’s house at Palatiw (reason that KC is a very smart and cute toddler that he might make kulit while we were working), and go to my usual wet market schedule every sunday, I got home seeing paulo already started the activity.
I cooked our meal for that day early as 9am so i can help him paint the house. Imagine that we spent 12 hours re-painting our i think 20sqm room. We had a lot of fun doing that activity. Making fun of our selves, little asaran, and yabangan, we make our day very fruitful on chats, chats about our future (ciempre naman), about our pasts.. discovering things that i never seen and known about each other before.
When almost 10pm, we finished painting the walls from the door to our small kitchen area through our little dining area and very little living area. We postponed painting the bedroom for the meantime we had no time anymore it’s almost 10pm and i still need to fetch Kenzi from my mother’s place in Palatiw.
After i got home from palatiw, Kenzi is already asleep. We both didn’t manage to take a bath that whole day and we both so dungis with paints. When 11pm we manage to clean ourselves and have a bath. Little kilig that he still had that energy to tease me and be naughty after that long tiring day. And so we had some.
Lying in bed, he had a hard time going to sleep (reason is he had an energy drink late that day and the whole day was spent drinking softdrinks- as he imply), so he started a chit chat. He asked some questions about my past boyfriends, first kiss etch and of course even if i’m so super tired i manage to chat with him as well. And also i asked of course about his’ just to be fair. We exchange chats about our not so easy to forget persons, situations with those persons and some things in our past life that are no longer a secret yet we still brought up to each other and etch. But still of course we both insist that we are both the most memorable person to each other (ciempre naman…).
Finding out how different and how SPECIAL I am among of his past was the most kilig portion of our chat. To be honest, knowing those things that i never heard from him before for 5 years almost made me cry due to happiness. The funny thing about it, was he considered me as “TUKSO” pala during that time with his longest relationship before me. Sounds irritating but when he told his reasons why he choose me, i realized that he is not that bad after all..
Another funny thing was an issue. The first torids was the most memorable for us and the bigger issue was confessing to each other that we both can’t beat our first torids. Close to “we are both bad kisser?” wahhhh of course not!
Nwei moving on. And we tackle our future. Our soon to be moving to his bought house in Bacoor. Showing his excitement and longing for it makes me really proud about having him. He really is a man. Responsible husband and a loving father who always puts family at the top. We talk about how he will design our soon to be 49sqm town house. To be honest i’m really very happy that he finally made that decision on moving to a bigger place. Lol because of him planning to have a big family of his own with 6 childrens. “Swerte nia kung pumayag ako “(^^,)v but i admit that im a little sad about living far from my mother’s. Well for the benefit of our family, im giving him all the authority to decide about where he will raise his children and soon to be 5 more…
Moving on. And we get in touch to some problems in our relationship. Disscuss about our i think big differences and shortcomings. Until we both ask each other why… why are we still together despite of the many instance that we almost separate. Separation that happens many times. Then we go back to how we met, reminisce why we decided to marry each other, and why we wanted to have this family. To keep Us together.
At this portion of our chat, i almost get emo. Bringing back those past, those terrible moments that i wanted to be free. That i wanted to separate from him. Now i realized that it is ONLY ME who wanted it. Before. Yes it is only me who always insist it before. That was in 4 years of our relationship. But now, I noticed that lately he also did want it to happen. He’s changed. Nah… maybe he get tired of me being so negative about our marriage for i always think of a broken ending.
Our chat that mornight ended 3am, me telling him what if we give it a chance, a chance to have a separation. Even for a some time. Why? He asked.. To prove something I answered. Or it is only me who wanted him to prove something for me. Then he turned his back at me. I asked him.. “antok ka na?” hugging him from his back. A simple nod answered me. I know and I’m not manhid, he was pissed for what he just heard from me. After all of his efforts on this family hay here i am again bringing a problem. I’m so praning kasi!
Paulo is a good husband and I should not give him heartaches yet in some point of our marriage, considering our relationship, and all the not so good things that has happened to us, as we grow together there are things that i needed him to realize. I have so many sentiments and hurtings inside me because of him that needed to be healed yet i had no chance on maybe to be alone for a while because i always think about the family first before myself. His consistent want for this family to be together till the end gives me more reasons to stay rather than cure my heartaches. So funny that it is also the same reason why during those time when we were just bf/gf and i intended to break up with him two to 3 times but failed is because he still sticks with the US issue. Until now… Ano papaka martir nalang ako? Big LOL! Not really. No matter what is that reason behind why we’re still together, the important thing is, still, we are both happy with each other.
There are NO perfect relationship in this world i know and in real life the only permanent thing that a person should consider is changes. People said that the only way to get to know your partner better is to be with that person and share your life with the person in one roof. Very True. I remember a professor in my college days imply “there is an expiry for Love. After 2 years, your considered True love will expire.” and “True meaning of relationship only starts after 5 years of being together” I therefore conclude, there is no such thing as true love. loling! nahhh. Logic. Be able to beat the 2 years true love expiry and reach the 5th year being in a relationship… YOU JUST FOUND YOUR SOULMATE.
I know i can be there. We’re almost getting there. New year, new life, another beginning, on a new house, in a new place, WITH OUR SOULMATE…
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